it takes two to tango and this dance does not always work out for the both of us.
When going through a divorce, it is common for outsiders to assume that either the husband or the wife had brought it upon themselves out of pure selfishness. The truth is that people are wrong. When we say “for better or for worse” we mean it.
Many couples work hard together to solve their issues and to get their marriages back on track, but it just isn’t meant to be. Perhaps it is too easy to get married, which is often closely followed by having kids, and in the inevitable life changes that follow, plus career stress, financial pressure and whatever else, we don’t only lose ourselves, but we become strangers to our partners.
Sadly, in some instances, one party is willing to work hard on a marriage, and the other isn’t. To one partner, the marriage may be everything, while for the other it is everything but. It would be interesting to see what those judgmental people would have to say if they really understood those circumstances before they started taking sides.
The truth is that in most cases, the map is not the territory. Nobody knows what goes on in a marriage except those that are invested in it - the couple and therefore nobody should judge.
Deciding to have a divorce, or being pushed into it when you really want to work on the marriage, is not an easy decision. It changes your life from the white picket fence dream you had on the day that you made your vows to something different. There are many emotions, decisions and choices that you have to deal with that you never even dreamed about. And if there are kids from the marriage, you’re not only hurting the parent you are judging, but also the children.
Disclaimer : This article provides basic information only and is not a substitute for a professional or legal advice. It is prudent to obtain legal advice from a family lawyer.