some toxic relationships result from poor decisions
Most relationships, even those that are not healthy, are built on a foundation of mutual respect. However, some relationships can become damaged over the longer term. Toxic relationships go beyond just unhealthy they are pervaded by an atmosphere that is poisonous. The people involved cannot live happy and productive lives.
Toxic relationships often develop because the people in the relationship are of such different personality types that they are unable to communicate with one another. Very often no-one is to blame for the problem. It is simply the result of poor decisions made in the past.
Some toxic relationships are however caused by the presence of a noxious individual in the relationship, one who manipulates and preys on the other, with the intention of taking for themselves the benefits of the other. This type of individual will frequently seek out a relationship that they perceive as being beneficial to themselves.
Such people do not realize that they have a problem. They are so absorbed with their own feelings, needs and objectives that they are unaware of the emotions, needs and objectives of anyone else.
Recognizing toxic circumstances
- Lack moral foundations
- Are unhealthy for the individuals involved
- Are dangerous and often include risky and abusive behaviour
- Are unpleasant for all those involved
- Can lead to the deliberate harm of one of the parties involved in the relationship
- Toxic persons have no regard for the feelings, wants or needs of others.
Psychopaths can prey on others
Some toxic people are psychopaths. Psychopaths are mentally ill. These people are often larger than life personalities and they act impulsively. They have an exaggerated sense of themselves and impossible expectations of others.
These self-centred individuals have little sense of their own emotions or the feelings of others. They seldom accept responsibility for anything that they have done. They hanker after praise and approval, a craving that they will never admit. Psychopaths need medical assistance, and if they seek such assistance, they may overcome some of their problems and live a happier life.
Not all toxic relationships result from unhealthy individuals in the relationship. It can just be that the individuals in the relationship are not able to get on together and make each other very unhappy.
Resolving the Situation
You can find out whether you are in a toxic relationship by examining how you feel in the presence of the other. If you feel unsafe or distressed in the company of the other you may have a toxic relationship. if you feel guarded or manipulated, if dealing with the other leaves you emotionally exhausted, if the other behaves unethically or immorally or if you feel that your partner is making your life unnecessarily challenging, you may have a toxic relationship.
If you’re in a toxic relationship you will have to decide whether you want to remain in a negative and unhappy situation. Are you prepared to continue to put your health and possibly your safety at risk?
Fixing a toxic relationship is very difficult. You will need help to fix your relationship if this is the route that you wish to take.
Many partners remain in a toxic relationship because they are co-dependent. In such a relationship they are dependent on the toxic partner. This co-dependence can result from the emotional or psychological needs of the person, but often the co-dependency is a financial one. Sometimes the children are the cause of the co-dependency. One parent may worry about losing their children to the other partner if they leave.
A toxic relationship is bad for your health and your happiness. The best thing that you can do if you are in such a relationship is to seek help or move on.
Disclaimer : This article provides basic information only and is not a substitute for a professional or legal advice. It is prudent to obtain legal advice from a family lawyer.